Friendship in different life stages

Avatar photo
Yicheng · Apr 6, 2025
On the journey of life, friendship is like a mirror—reflecting how much we have grown and how far we have come. From carefree childhood playmates to soul-level companions in our later years, friendship isn’t static—it evolves as our minds expand, our values shift, and our lives unfold. Like leveling up in a game (but with […]

On the journey of life, friendship is like a mirror—reflecting how much we have grown and how far we have come. From carefree childhood playmates to soul-level companions in our later years, friendship isn’t static—it evolves as our minds expand, our values shift, and our lives unfold.


Like leveling up in a game (but with more hugs and fewer boss fights), friendship comes in stages. Each level marks a milestone in our personal evolution.


Here are the five major stages of friendship we encounter through life—each one a snapshot of who we are becoming.

Stage 1: Friends in early childhood development

Childhood is when our humanity first starts to bloom, and friendship quietly plants its seed.
At this stage, our connections are simple and pure—no hidden agendas, no value alignment required. Just the joy of shared time, shared space, and shared games.

  • We become friends because we live on the same street, go to the same school, or love the same cartoons and video games.
  • Arguments happen, sure—but so do quick reconciliations. One moment we’re fighting, the next we’re laughing and walking hand-in-hand again.
  • These early playmates may not stay with us forever, but they give us our very first idea of what friendship means—unfiltered, uncomplicated, and unforgettable.

Stage 2: Teenager friendship—seeking a sense of self

Welcome to adolescence, where “Who am I?” becomes the question of the hour—and friendship suddenly gets way more personal. No longer just about playing together, friendships now revolve around feelings, secrets, and those late-night talks about life, love, and everything in between.

  • At this stage, friends become mirrors for our emerging identity.
  • We start to define ourselves by who we hang out with, and we choose our people based on shared passions, values, and vibes.
  • In the quiet symmetry of our thoughts and tastes, friendship found its way.

This is the first time friendship becomes a reflection of our inner world. We’re no longer just accepting friends—we’re selecting them, curating our own little tribe.

Stage 3: Support and friends in Midlife crisis

From early adulthood into midlife, we step into the busiest, most demanding chapters of our lives. With the burdens of growing responsibilities and multiple social roles, friendship evolves once again—it becomes less about simply sharing, and more about showing up, backing each other, and building something side by side.

  • We connect with like-minded peers and grow together.
  • Some become partners in our careers, others anchors in our emotional world.
  • Relationships start to take on a more pragmatic tone. Trust becomes rare, but when it’s real, it means more than ever.

Friendship at this stage blends support, collaboration, even shared responsibilities and stakes. And because life can be tough, the bonds forged through mutual effort and hard-earned trust often run deeper, and last longer.

Stage 4: Echoes of belief — when faith and friendship intertwine

As we enter later adulthood, life’s experiences begin to settle into clarity, and our values deepen. Friendships in this stage gently shift away from practicality and lean into something quieter, something deeper—soulful resonance and inner peace.

  • We find connection with those who share our beliefs, spiritual paths, or worldview.
  • These friends may not be in touch every day, but when life feels heavy or uncertain, they’re the ones whose presence brings calm and direction.
  • They don’t just “get along” with us—they truly resonate with us.

At this point, real friendship becomes less about collaborating in the outer world, and more about holding space in the inner one.

Stage 5: Soul mates — life’s mirrors, silently seen

This is the highest level of friendship—an unspoken connection so profound, it speaks louder than words. These companions are rare, perhaps even one in a lifetime. But their presence assures you that your life has been anything but wasted.

  • Soul companions walk beside you in ways that transcend ordinary friendship. They see the world as you do, and understand the words you’ve yet to speak.
  • Sometimes, they guide your spirit; sometimes, they challenge your thoughts, acting as both mirror and catalyst.
  • These friendships don’t require constant proximity, but every meeting feels like a reunion of souls, a deep conversation beyond the surface.

Soul companions are what we meet only after years of living, as the years distill wisdom into the rarest of connections. They aren’t the friends we choose—they are the kindred spirits fate sends our way.

Conclusion: Friendship as a reflection of life’s growth

The stages of friendship are not a matter of comparison, but a reflection of the different needs and growths we experience throughout life. From the carefree “playmates” of childhood to the “soulmates” of our later years, each level of friendship acts as a mirror, revealing how we understand the world, others, and most importantly, ourselves.

Maturity doesn’t come with having more friends—it comes with knowing, more and more, who truly deserves to walk beside you. Life’s journey may sometimes feel solitary, but real friendship lights the way, casting a warm glow in the hearts of those who find each other in the vast sea of humanity.

Share this article:
LEARN MORE

Continue Reading

公务员的“制度牛马”人生:全球制度演化下的牺牲者逻辑

公务员的“制度牛马”人生:全球制度演化下的牺牲者逻辑

Daohe · Aug 30, 2025

——跨越历史、文明与制度的制度性操控陷阱 引言:全球性悲剧,制度型设定 在今天的许多国家,不论是民主国家、威权体制,还是新兴政体,“公务员群体”的角色都被困于一种危险而悖谬的结构中: 既要求他们忠诚,却不给他们清白的空间; 既赋予他们权力,却不保障他们的人格; 既要他们维持秩序,却随时能将其当作代罪羔羊。 这种“制度牛马式人生”不是东方独有,也非威权特产,而是全球制度文明长期演化的副产品,是行政官僚体系内部固有的牺牲机制,具有全球普遍性与制度传承性。 一、从古代帝国到殖民体制:公务员的全球“牺牲性”起源 1. 古罗马与波斯帝国:忠诚工具人 vs. 权力收割机 古罗马帝国建立了全世界最早的大型文官系统之一,但这套系统的核心逻辑就是:“执行者无权,责任全责”。地方总督若不能维稳、征税、供应军粮,就可能被元老院弹劾、失职流放,甚至当街处死。 波斯帝国也是如此,其“御使”(即帝国巡查员)虽地位崇高,却是帝王“耳目”与“祭品”合一——一旦被怀疑忠诚动摇,先杀之而后问责。 2. 中世纪教权与王权体系:公务官僚的高压困局 在中世纪的西欧王权与教权共治体系中,王室“书记官”、教廷“执事长”都是顶级公务员,却也是最高风险承担者。许多“替主办事”的高级行政人员死于权斗、背锅与舆情清算。 如英格兰托马斯·贝克特,既是忠臣,也是“政治尸体”。 3. 殖民体系:全球外派官僚的双重囚笼 英、法、荷、西等殖民帝国在全球派驻大量殖民地行政官员,他们既要“平定土著、榨取税收”,又不能得罪母国议会和本地资本。这些人时常在殖民危机、起义失败、经济衰退中成为“第一批牺牲者”。 全球殖民史中的“倒霉总督”,是最真实的制度燃料使用记录。 二、近现代国家的“行政机器”:权力之中被去人格 1. 纳粹德国与苏联体制:制度牲畜的极致形态 在极权制度下,公务员几乎是制度的消耗品: 这种政体下的公务员,表面代表国家,实则是高压权力体系的第一轮牺牲群体。 2. 民主国家的替罪结构:舆情下的抛弃机制 即使在制度成熟的民主国家,公务员也并未逃离“可抛弃性命运”: 民主制度未必更温和,只是抛弃公务员的方式更“文明”。 三、现代“制度牛马”人生的五大特征:全球通行的“操控套件” 无论是在哪个国家,今天的公务员系统都呈现出一种高度相似的“可操控“制度牛马”系统结构”: 1. 权力与责任严重不对称 拥有有限执行权,却必须对政策失误、舆情崩盘、预算危机负责。真正的决策者“法律免责”,执行者则“程序问责”。 2. 收入与期望严重错位 全球多数国家的公务员收入不足以匹配其工作强度与公众期待,从而滋生合法之外的“灰色激励体系、即灰色收入”。 3. 忠诚与独立人格不可共存 在许多国家,“政治中立”与“制度忠诚”常常矛盾。一名公务员若太独立思考,便容易被视为“不合作份子”;若过度服从,又将失去社会信任。 4. 被制度诱腐,再被制度清算 制度在表面上鼓励清廉,但在实际中留下大量“可腐空间”作为控制手段。一旦需要清洗,就从中选出“替罪羊”以平息不满。 5. 最终成为社会愤怒的集装箱 无论是民众对贫富不均、治理失效、官僚作风的怨恨,最终往往集中喷向公务员无能、腐败、躺平、弱智、不作为,而不是资本权贵或体制高层。 四、为什么制度总要一个“可杀的执行群体”? 制度总要解决三个关键难题: 问题 制度对策 如何维持执行效率? 养一群服从且依赖体制的人 如何延长制度稳定性? […]

世界に普遍的に存在する二つの人生:「制度の歯車」としての人生と「制度の燃料」としての人生

世界に普遍的に存在する二つの人生:「制度の歯車」としての人生と「制度の燃料」としての人生

Kishou · Aug 29, 2025

——人生を理解する:グローバルな制度進化における共生のジレンマと、そこからの解放への道 序論:世界的な制度の罠と、二つの人生の普遍性 北米、ヨーロッパ、アフリカ、ラテンアメリカ、中東、そしてアジアの各地域に至るまで、世界の社会には、制度設計によって形作られた二つの人生モデルが普遍的に存在します。それは、公務員の「制度の歯車」としての人生と、大衆の「制度の燃料」としての人生です。この二つの生き方は一見すると無関係に見えますが、現代の制度という機械において不可欠な二つの歯車であり、国家と社会の運転を共に駆動させると同時に、制度がもたらす深層的な操作と抑圧を共に受け止めています。 グローバルな視野からこの問題に切り込み、二つの人生の共通点と相違点を明らかにすることでのみ、現代の制度文明が抱える苦境をより深く理解し、その解決の道を模索することができるのです。 一、公務員の「制度の歯車」人生:世界の執行者たちが置かれた板挟みの状況 1.地域を越えた共通点:権限は限定的、しかし責任は重い 2. 役割の矛盾:忠誠心と人格の抑圧 公務員は上層部の政策を厳格に執行することを求められますが、十分な意思決定権や人格的な尊重を欠いています。彼らは制度における「交換可能な部品」となり、いつでも排除されるリスクに晒されています。 二、大衆の「制度の燃料」人生:世界で消耗され続ける社会の主体 1. 経済的搾取と社会的疎外の普遍的な存在 2. イデオロギーと情報操作という世界的現象 大衆は、断片化されたメディア環境の中で情緒的に誘導され、制度の深層的な問題に対する認識を欠いています。その感情は容易に操作され、制度を安定させ、動かし続けるための「従順な燃料」となります。 三、対立の否定:文化を越えた理解の下での共生の現実 四、グローバルな視点からの制度再設計:公正と尊厳を目指して 結論:共生を認識し、共に制度の束縛から解放されるために 公務員の「制度の歯車」としての人生と、大衆の「制度の燃料」としての人生は、現代のグローバルな制度文明における普遍的な現象であると同時に、制度的な共生のジレンマでもあります。文化の違いを乗り越え、互いの状況を認識し、共に制度設計を改革することでのみ、世界の社会は誤解と対立から抜け出し、真の公正、尊厳、そして幸福を実現できるのです。

read more

Related Content

What is real success?
Avatar photo
Daohe · Oct 31, 2024
People are often obsessed with external standards of success, caught up in comparisons and competition, and view success as an end goal. However, for every human being, we are born successful. From the moment life first blooms, our life carries unique meaning and value. Regardless of wealth or status, our existence in this world is […]
The Two Sides of Living: Democracy or Slavery
The Two Sides of Living: Democracy or Slavery
Avatar photo
Yicheng · Mar 28, 2025
To be human is not just about biological survival, but about the growth of our spirit and soul. However, the meaning of “living” varies greatly at different stages of history and civilization. Some live in fear, oppression, and deception, simply striving to survive in chaotic times, indifferent to right or wrong. Others live in awakening, […]
Individual Effort And Empowering: 6 Interesting Points
Avatar photo
Daohe · Dec 31, 2024
In many societies, the narrative of individual effort reigns supreme. We are taught from a young age that hard work and perseverance are the keys to success. While this belief in the power of personal determination can be empowering, it often comes at the cost of ignoring the broader systemic forces that shape our lives. […]
View All Content