Love Never Fades— We are the Ones Who Drift Away

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Kishou · Nov 6, 2024
Though love is considered part of human nature, many people question or deny its existence because of past traumas or an absence of love in their lives. However, the real problem lies in their inner disconnection from love. Rebuilding trust in love and cultivating self-love are crucial to overcoming loneliness and rediscovering the warmth and truth of love.

While some view love as an intrinsic human quality, the soul’s warmest refuge, others are deeply skeptical of its existence, even outright denying it. They argue that there is no love in the world, or that love is nothing more than an illusion or a tool for survival.

These beliefs are not so much a result of them having seen through love, but rather that, deep within, they have been cast aside by their own love—or more accurately, they have become disconnected from love.

 

I. Skepticism Toward Love: What Causes It?”

People often doubt or stop believing in love due to past experiences, particularly those marked by betrayal or disappointment. After being hurt, they build emotional walls to shield themselves from pain. For example, some people have given their love wholeheartedly, only to be betrayed, ignored, or harmed. Fear of further hurt leads them to reject love as a form of self-protection.

For some, a lack of love in childhood—due to cold families, harsh environments, or a lack of care—leaves them with no real understanding of love. It feels foreign and even luxurious to them, as they’ve never experienced it. Love becomes an abstract ideal—something they’ve never known, not a tangible emotional bond they can believe in.

 

The Absence of Self-Love: The Suffering of Self-Abandonment

Being abandoned by one’s own love means not only losing external affection but also losing self-love, which is especially common among those who constantly self-deny and feel inner loneliness. Self-love is essential for happiness and security, but when someone feels worthless or rejects their own being, they fall into an emotional void. This self-abandonment makes it hard for them to trust love, as their lack of self-love leads them to believe no one can truly love them.

Being abandoned by one’s own love is like wandering in a barren desert, with no warmth or comfort to be found. Such people tend to become distant, withdrawn, and skeptical of all emotional connections. They perceive love as a fantasy because they have never truly experienced it, and this emotional deprivation is rooted in their disconnection from the love deep within themselves.

 

Re-embracing Love: Rebuilding Inner Love and Trust

or those who do not believe in love or no longer love themselves, re-embracing love is a difficult but essential journey. It is not about seeking external validation, but about starting from within—relearning and understanding love, ultimately accepting both self-love and love from the world.

1. Healing Past Wounds: To restore trust in love, healing past hurts is essential. Those who have been hurt need to take the time to face their wounds and let go of inner pain. This journey may need the support of others or professional help, but as they start to heal, their barriers and doubts will begin to diminish.

2. Learning to Love Oneself: To love others, one must first learn to accept and appreciate oneself. Loving oneself involves self-compassion, acknowledging emotional needs, and giving oneself understanding. A person who truly practices self-love can cultivate the capacity to give and receive love.

3. Opening the Heart to Receive Love: Long-term isolation can lead to loneliness, indifference, and even a loss of sensitivity to love. Opening up courageously gives others a chance to show love, and it also gives oneself the chance to experience love once more.

4. Cultivating a Love for Life: Love extends beyond relationships to include a deep appreciation for life itself. Developing interests, enjoying nature, and engaging in beauty can help build a genuine love for life. In time, this warmth can break down inner barriers, allowing a renewed sense of love to emerge.

4. Love Brings Wholeness

When someone reconnects with love, they realize it was never truly absent. Love is not just emotional exchange, but a source of comfort and strength. Rediscovering love brings hope, warmth, and purpose. By believing in and embracing love, including self-love, a person moves from loneliness to a heart full of life and warmth.

For those who have lost trust in love and abandoned themselves, starting with self-acceptance and learning to understand and embrace love again will help them realize that love completes them, guiding them out of the emptiness of living without love, and bringing true inner peace and fulfillment.

Love is not a fragile emotion or an unattainable ideal, but a deep and real presence. When someone reopens to love, it becomes like a warm light, illuminating the darkness within and dispelling long-held shadows. In this light, people can see themselves more clearly, confront wounds and vulnerabilities they once avoided, and recognize the possibility of healing and hope for the future.

 

Conclusion: Reclaiming Love, Returning to Self

Some people do not believe in the existence of love, thinking they no longer need it. In reality, they have simply been abandoned by the love within themselves and disconnected from their true self.

To break free from this loveless predicament, one must start from the heart, rediscover the ability to love oneself, trust others, and embrace life. Only then can they reconnect with the love deep within, experiencing the warmth and strength it brings. When love is no longer an illusion but a tangible part of life, they will realize that love has always been within them—it never truly left.

Perhaps, on the journey of life, we all need to reconnect with love. For only love can make our lives whole and meaningful; only love can free us from loneliness. May those who have once felt abandoned by their own love find its source again deep within, embrace love and warmth, and move toward their true selves, walking the path of a fulfilled life.

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社会组织中的家庭组织:婚姻观念的历史性变迁

Yicheng · Feb 22, 2025

从封建到现代:婚姻观念的历史性转变 婚姻自古以来便是社会的基石,承载着人与人之间的情感、责任与文化传承。然而,在封建社会中,婚姻制度深受性别和阶级不平等的影响,尤其是“男方付出礼金”的习俗,体现了封建社会对女性的物化与家庭之间的经济交换关系。 随着时代变迁、社会思想的进步,以及社会公民资本市场经济体制的发展,婚姻的本质和社会功能正在发生深刻变革。从封建婚姻到现代平等婚姻,再到未来的社会公民资本市场经济体制下的社会共同责任婚姻,婚姻已不再只是个人或家庭的事务,而逐渐成为社会整体发展的重要组成部分。 一、封建制度国家的非公民婚姻:男方付出礼金的婚姻交易模式 在封建社会,婚姻不仅仅是个人情感的结合,更是家族利益的延续。男方支付礼金不仅是一种经济行为,更体现了男性在婚姻中的主导地位,而女性则被视为家庭资产的一部分。 礼金的本质是一种“交换”,即男方以金钱换取女方的归属权,这使得女性在婚姻关系中处于被动地位。女性的婚姻价值往往由家族背景、社会阶层以及经济能力决定,而非个人的意愿、能力或情感需求。婚姻决策往往掌握在长辈手中,个人的自由选择权被极大地压缩。 然而,随着女性社会地位的提高、教育的普及以及法治的发展,人们开始质疑这种基于经济交易的婚姻模式。现代社会更加强调个体价值和自由意志,越来越多的年轻人摒弃了礼金传统,婚姻逐渐回归到情感、理解与责任的基础之上。 二、资本制度国家的国家公民婚姻:双方面的平等付出 在资本制度国家,婚姻从一种家族契约演变为个人之间的平等合作关系。在这一体系下,婚姻的核心不再是家族利益的交换,而是双方基于情感、经济与社会责任的共同承诺。 现代婚姻的变化体现在多个方面: 这种双方面的付出,使婚姻从封建社会的单向交换关系,转变为更加稳定和公平的合作模式。 三、社会公民资本市场经济体制下的社会公民婚姻:社会共同的责任 随着社会的进步,婚姻不再仅仅是个体之间的承诺,而是社会整体发展的重要组成部分。在社会公民资本市场经济体制下,婚姻被纳入社会责任体系,国家、社会与家庭共同承担婚姻的稳定与发展。 这一体系下的婚姻制度具有以下特征: 在这一体系下,婚姻的稳定不仅是夫妻双方的责任,更是整个社会的责任。 社会不再是婚姻的旁观者,而是通过制度保障婚姻的健康发展,使婚姻成为社会共同繁荣的一部分。 结语 婚姻制度的演变,是社会进步的重要体现。从封建社会的经济交换婚姻,到现代资本制度下的平等婚姻,再到未来的社会公民资本市场经济体制下的社会责任婚姻,婚姻的本质不断被重塑。 现代婚姻的发展趋势表明,婚姻不仅是个人的事情,更是社会整体运作的一部分。未来,婚姻制度将在更加公平、共享、责任共担的基础上,迎来新的发展阶段。

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