Love Never Fades— We are the Ones Who Drift Away

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Kishou · Nov 6, 2024
Though love is considered part of human nature, many people question or deny its existence because of past traumas or an absence of love in their lives. However, the real problem lies in their inner disconnection from love. Rebuilding trust in love and cultivating self-love are crucial to overcoming loneliness and rediscovering the warmth and truth of love.

While some view love as an intrinsic human quality, the soul’s warmest refuge, others are deeply skeptical of its existence, even outright denying it. They argue that there is no love in the world, or that love is nothing more than an illusion or a tool for survival.

These beliefs are not so much a result of them having seen through love, but rather that, deep within, they have been cast aside by their own love—or more accurately, they have become disconnected from love.

 

I. Skepticism Toward Love: What Causes It?”

People often doubt or stop believing in love due to past experiences, particularly those marked by betrayal or disappointment. After being hurt, they build emotional walls to shield themselves from pain. For example, some people have given their love wholeheartedly, only to be betrayed, ignored, or harmed. Fear of further hurt leads them to reject love as a form of self-protection.

For some, a lack of love in childhood—due to cold families, harsh environments, or a lack of care—leaves them with no real understanding of love. It feels foreign and even luxurious to them, as they’ve never experienced it. Love becomes an abstract ideal—something they’ve never known, not a tangible emotional bond they can believe in.

 

The Absence of Self-Love: The Suffering of Self-Abandonment

Being abandoned by one’s own love means not only losing external affection but also losing self-love, which is especially common among those who constantly self-deny and feel inner loneliness. Self-love is essential for happiness and security, but when someone feels worthless or rejects their own being, they fall into an emotional void. This self-abandonment makes it hard for them to trust love, as their lack of self-love leads them to believe no one can truly love them.

Being abandoned by one’s own love is like wandering in a barren desert, with no warmth or comfort to be found. Such people tend to become distant, withdrawn, and skeptical of all emotional connections. They perceive love as a fantasy because they have never truly experienced it, and this emotional deprivation is rooted in their disconnection from the love deep within themselves.

 

Re-embracing Love: Rebuilding Inner Love and Trust

or those who do not believe in love or no longer love themselves, re-embracing love is a difficult but essential journey. It is not about seeking external validation, but about starting from within—relearning and understanding love, ultimately accepting both self-love and love from the world.

1. Healing Past Wounds: To restore trust in love, healing past hurts is essential. Those who have been hurt need to take the time to face their wounds and let go of inner pain. This journey may need the support of others or professional help, but as they start to heal, their barriers and doubts will begin to diminish.

2. Learning to Love Oneself: To love others, one must first learn to accept and appreciate oneself. Loving oneself involves self-compassion, acknowledging emotional needs, and giving oneself understanding. A person who truly practices self-love can cultivate the capacity to give and receive love.

3. Opening the Heart to Receive Love: Long-term isolation can lead to loneliness, indifference, and even a loss of sensitivity to love. Opening up courageously gives others a chance to show love, and it also gives oneself the chance to experience love once more.

4. Cultivating a Love for Life: Love extends beyond relationships to include a deep appreciation for life itself. Developing interests, enjoying nature, and engaging in beauty can help build a genuine love for life. In time, this warmth can break down inner barriers, allowing a renewed sense of love to emerge.

4. Love Brings Wholeness

When someone reconnects with love, they realize it was never truly absent. Love is not just emotional exchange, but a source of comfort and strength. Rediscovering love brings hope, warmth, and purpose. By believing in and embracing love, including self-love, a person moves from loneliness to a heart full of life and warmth.

For those who have lost trust in love and abandoned themselves, starting with self-acceptance and learning to understand and embrace love again will help them realize that love completes them, guiding them out of the emptiness of living without love, and bringing true inner peace and fulfillment.

Love is not a fragile emotion or an unattainable ideal, but a deep and real presence. When someone reopens to love, it becomes like a warm light, illuminating the darkness within and dispelling long-held shadows. In this light, people can see themselves more clearly, confront wounds and vulnerabilities they once avoided, and recognize the possibility of healing and hope for the future.

 

Conclusion: Reclaiming Love, Returning to Self

Some people do not believe in the existence of love, thinking they no longer need it. In reality, they have simply been abandoned by the love within themselves and disconnected from their true self.

To break free from this loveless predicament, one must start from the heart, rediscover the ability to love oneself, trust others, and embrace life. Only then can they reconnect with the love deep within, experiencing the warmth and strength it brings. When love is no longer an illusion but a tangible part of life, they will realize that love has always been within them—it never truly left.

Perhaps, on the journey of life, we all need to reconnect with love. For only love can make our lives whole and meaningful; only love can free us from loneliness. May those who have once felt abandoned by their own love find its source again deep within, embrace love and warmth, and move toward their true selves, walking the path of a fulfilled life.

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What Is Civilization, the Mysterious Concept that is So Hard to Grasp?

Yicheng · Nov 7, 2024

This article comes from a volunteer meeting where Daohe shared her insight on the concept of “civilization”. As a member of the volunteer group, I took notes during the discussion and wrote this article later. Please excuse any incomplete or missing details in the article. Introduction Recently, while explaining the vision and mission of Yicheng […]

社会公民学能让公民生活更加美好

Daohe · Nov 6, 2024

作为人类社会历史上的一个重要概念,“公民”不仅代表个人身份,更象征着集体责任和社会意识。公民研究正是围绕着这种觉醒,探讨公民之间的合作、参与和责任如何能够构建一个更美好的社会。 在漫长的历史进程中,人类从个体劳动走向了集体协作,从分散的创造走向了共同的发展。正如社会公民学所强调的,公民的角色不仅仅是国家政策的被动接受者,更是文明进步的推动者。因此,社会公民的出现代表了人类文明从“国家公民”向更高层次的“社会公民”发展的必然趋势。这种转变不仅仅是一种形式上的变化,更是衡量一个社会是否进步、福利是否提升、文明是否向前发展的重要指标。 一、资本化与社会公民学的关系 在现代社会的发展过程中,资本化已经成为许多国家必须面对的议题。资本化的不断深化,为社会带来了经济繁荣和资源积累,但也带来了新的挑战。一些国家开始反思,是否所有的资本化进程都符合社会整体利益?在这些反思中,社会公民学提出了独特的视角:资本化的真正价值,不在于追求无限的资本扩张,而在于如何通过资本的合理运用,提升公民的生活质量,保障社会的长远福祉。 实际上,人类文明的发展史就是一部资本发展的历史。然而,盲目追求资本自由化,并不等同于真正的社会进步。社会公民学关注的不仅是经济利益的最大化,还关注资本如何服务于公民的福利、如何实现社会的共同进步。它强调,通过构建“社会公民”的概念,使每个公民都意识到自己在社会中的角色,理解资本和社会福利的平衡关系。 二、资本主义模式下的社会公民 在资本主义主导的社会中,人们对资本的定义和理解差异较大。一方面,有些人认为“国家公民”应当完全服从资本主义的规则;另一方面,也有声音认为资本主义模式下的“国家公民”应保持独立思考,不仅限于服从经济规则,而要关注资本对社会的影响。社会公民学恰好提出了一种新的思路——“社会公民”这一概念,让人们意识到:公民不仅是资本的消费者和生产者,更是社会发展、文明进步的关键推动者。 因此,在资本主义模式下,社会公民学的任务不是简单地接受资本逻辑,而是通过培育公民意识,让公民在经济活动中具备判断力和责任感。只有当社会公民意识到自己的权利和责任,才能在资本自由化的背景下,实现真正的社会进步。 三、社会公民学的核心:从国家公民到社会公民 当今全球化的浪潮和信息化的发展让许多人提出“全球公民”的概念,似乎人类的最终归宿是消除一切地域和文化差异,成为全球一体化的“全球公民”。然而,社会公民学提醒我们,在走向全球化的过程中,我们首先需要建设“社会公民”,即关注所在国家和社会组织的公民身份,从社会事务的被动参与者变成主导和推动者。这种公民身份是社会结构的基础,是共同利益、共同责任和共同福祉的体现。 社会公民并非一种单纯的意识形态,而是实践中的现实需要。 社会公民学关注的是如何通过社会集体意识的努力,增强社会福利生产,保障社会的公平正义。公民不仅是国家的一部分,更是整个社会的“细胞”。只有当这些“细胞”都充满活力和责任意识时,社会才能真正进步。 因此,社会公民学的核心在于从“国家公民”向“社会公民”的转变,让公民不仅在国家承担社会责任,与创造共同利益;同时也必须拥有更好,更优秀的创造幸福的能力与资源,承担人类社会责任,创造共同利益的使命感。 四、社会公民学在社会福利生产中的作用 社会公民学还在于推动“社会福利生产”,即不仅满足于现有的福利体系,还要不断地创新、增加和提升福利的质量。社会福利生产可以看作是人类文明不断跃升的一个过程。 社会公民学认为,公民不仅是福利的受益者,更应是福利的创造者。 一个公民社会的良好运作,依赖于每个公民的积极参与和贡献。 具体而言,社会福利生产不仅仅是物质财富的分配,更是一种基于公平和社会公正的系统。社会公民学鼓励公民通过自身的公共劳动、公共活动、社会志愿服务、社区建设等形式,为社会福利体系的完善做出贡献。这种生产和保障体系的建立,不仅使得社会公民成为福利的享有者,更成为福利的生产者,从而提升整个社会的幸福感和满足感。 五、社会公民学对文明进步的贡献 在社会公民学的视野中,文明的进步不仅在于物质财富的积累,更在于精神层面的提升。作为公民,我们拥有社会的参与权、决策权,也承担社会发展的义务。 社会公民学的核心目标,是推动文明的可持续发展,通过公民个人的集体努力实现社会的不断进步。 社会公民学带来的文明进步体现在多个层面。首先,公民意识的觉醒,让每个个体更加尊重他人,珍视社会集体利益。其次,社会公民意识的培养,促使人们在思考自身利益时也关心社会的整体福祉与社会福利的再创造。 社会公民学帮助我们超越“个人利益最大化”的思维模式,理解到我们每个人的命运与社会的命运息息相关。通过提升社会公民的责任感,社会公民学能够让社会朝着更加公平、更加包容的方向发展。 六、社会公民学的最终目标:一个可持续发展的和谐社会 社会公民学的最终目标是实现一个和谐的、可持续发展的社会,这个社会不再以单纯的经济增长为导向,而是将人类福祉社会公平与创造放在首位。在这种理想的社会结构中,公民既享有创造权与各项权利,也履行义务,形成对社会、对未来负责任的公民集体。社会公民学带来的觉醒和共识,使得社会中的每个成员都可以在实现自我价值的同时,为社会的和谐与可持续发展贡献力量。 随着社会公民意识的提升,社会各个领域都会逐渐发生积极的变化。教育将不再局限于知识传授,而是注重培养学生的社会文明责任感;企业在追求利润的同时,也将注重对社会福利生产创造与社会福利保障服务的回馈;政府政策将更多地考虑到社会的长远利益而非短期的经济收益。社会公民学推动的是一种全社会的深层次变革,带领我们走向一个更加美好的公民生活。 结语 社会公民学不仅是学术理论,更是一种关乎未来社会建设的实践方向。 它引导我们从资本主义的桎梏中解放出来,让我们看到一个超越经济利益的社会愿景:一个尊重公民创造权与各项权利、强调社会福利生活与保障服务的责任、也强调社会公民单一私人单元对社会的贡献,是追求共同福利的社会。 在这个社会中,公民通过彼此的理解和合作,共同创造一个包容、和谐、充满活力的生活环境。 通过社会公民学的推广,我们将建立起更具社会关怀和道德意识的公民群体,这个群体将引领人类文明朝着更加文明、更加可持续的方向发展。社会公民学能让我们的公民生活更加美好,因为它让我们从“个人利益最大化”的限制中解放出来,带我们进入一个彼此关爱、互相支持的社会大家庭。  

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