Love Never Fades— We are the Ones Who Drift Away

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Kishou · Nov 6, 2024
Though love is considered part of human nature, many people question or deny its existence because of past traumas or an absence of love in their lives. However, the real problem lies in their inner disconnection from love. Rebuilding trust in love and cultivating self-love are crucial to overcoming loneliness and rediscovering the warmth and truth of love.

While some view love as an intrinsic human quality, the soul’s warmest refuge, others are deeply skeptical of its existence, even outright denying it. They argue that there is no love in the world, or that love is nothing more than an illusion or a tool for survival.

These beliefs are not so much a result of them having seen through love, but rather that, deep within, they have been cast aside by their own love—or more accurately, they have become disconnected from love.

 

I. Skepticism Toward Love: What Causes It?”

People often doubt or stop believing in love due to past experiences, particularly those marked by betrayal or disappointment. After being hurt, they build emotional walls to shield themselves from pain. For example, some people have given their love wholeheartedly, only to be betrayed, ignored, or harmed. Fear of further hurt leads them to reject love as a form of self-protection.

For some, a lack of love in childhood—due to cold families, harsh environments, or a lack of care—leaves them with no real understanding of love. It feels foreign and even luxurious to them, as they’ve never experienced it. Love becomes an abstract ideal—something they’ve never known, not a tangible emotional bond they can believe in.

 

The Absence of Self-Love: The Suffering of Self-Abandonment

Being abandoned by one’s own love means not only losing external affection but also losing self-love, which is especially common among those who constantly self-deny and feel inner loneliness. Self-love is essential for happiness and security, but when someone feels worthless or rejects their own being, they fall into an emotional void. This self-abandonment makes it hard for them to trust love, as their lack of self-love leads them to believe no one can truly love them.

Being abandoned by one’s own love is like wandering in a barren desert, with no warmth or comfort to be found. Such people tend to become distant, withdrawn, and skeptical of all emotional connections. They perceive love as a fantasy because they have never truly experienced it, and this emotional deprivation is rooted in their disconnection from the love deep within themselves.

 

Re-embracing Love: Rebuilding Inner Love and Trust

or those who do not believe in love or no longer love themselves, re-embracing love is a difficult but essential journey. It is not about seeking external validation, but about starting from within—relearning and understanding love, ultimately accepting both self-love and love from the world.

1. Healing Past Wounds: To restore trust in love, healing past hurts is essential. Those who have been hurt need to take the time to face their wounds and let go of inner pain. This journey may need the support of others or professional help, but as they start to heal, their barriers and doubts will begin to diminish.

2. Learning to Love Oneself: To love others, one must first learn to accept and appreciate oneself. Loving oneself involves self-compassion, acknowledging emotional needs, and giving oneself understanding. A person who truly practices self-love can cultivate the capacity to give and receive love.

3. Opening the Heart to Receive Love: Long-term isolation can lead to loneliness, indifference, and even a loss of sensitivity to love. Opening up courageously gives others a chance to show love, and it also gives oneself the chance to experience love once more.

4. Cultivating a Love for Life: Love extends beyond relationships to include a deep appreciation for life itself. Developing interests, enjoying nature, and engaging in beauty can help build a genuine love for life. In time, this warmth can break down inner barriers, allowing a renewed sense of love to emerge.

4. Love Brings Wholeness

When someone reconnects with love, they realize it was never truly absent. Love is not just emotional exchange, but a source of comfort and strength. Rediscovering love brings hope, warmth, and purpose. By believing in and embracing love, including self-love, a person moves from loneliness to a heart full of life and warmth.

For those who have lost trust in love and abandoned themselves, starting with self-acceptance and learning to understand and embrace love again will help them realize that love completes them, guiding them out of the emptiness of living without love, and bringing true inner peace and fulfillment.

Love is not a fragile emotion or an unattainable ideal, but a deep and real presence. When someone reopens to love, it becomes like a warm light, illuminating the darkness within and dispelling long-held shadows. In this light, people can see themselves more clearly, confront wounds and vulnerabilities they once avoided, and recognize the possibility of healing and hope for the future.

 

Conclusion: Reclaiming Love, Returning to Self

Some people do not believe in the existence of love, thinking they no longer need it. In reality, they have simply been abandoned by the love within themselves and disconnected from their true self.

To break free from this loveless predicament, one must start from the heart, rediscover the ability to love oneself, trust others, and embrace life. Only then can they reconnect with the love deep within, experiencing the warmth and strength it brings. When love is no longer an illusion but a tangible part of life, they will realize that love has always been within them—it never truly left.

Perhaps, on the journey of life, we all need to reconnect with love. For only love can make our lives whole and meaningful; only love can free us from loneliness. May those who have once felt abandoned by their own love find its source again deep within, embrace love and warmth, and move toward their true selves, walking the path of a fulfilled life.

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修行,就是不斷的培養善,深入善

Daohe · Oct 28, 2024

許多人認為,修行是尋求內心平靜、智慧與覺悟的過程。在這個過程中,善是基本的要求。然而,很多人對善還存在著根本的誤解。善不是單一的行為,而是一種自內而外的深刻信念,是我們內心對他人和世界無條件的愛。這份愛讓我們不斷擴展與深入善,讓善行成為生活中自然的流露與表達。 善的源頭:內心的愛 很多人對善的理解停留在表面,導致認知和行動的誤區。有些人認為的善是一種示弱,還有些人認為只要不傷害別人,就是一種善。這些都是對善的錯誤定義。真正的善來自內心對他人、對世界的無條件的關愛與祝福。如果缺少這份愛,善往往只是一種自保行為,也可能是為了融入社會、迎合環境的表面努力,只是一種偽善。只有當我們發自內心去關愛和祝福世界中的每一個生命,善才會成為一種發自本能的舉動,並超越了外界的認可與回報。這種善是一種靈魂深處的力量,是對生命的尊重與呵護,是對世界的真誠關懷。這種善可以讓人在複雜的情境中保持純粹,穿透自私和偏見的層層障礙,而不會迷失,能讓人堅定地面對世間的邪惡與冷漠。 長養善根:善的層次與成長 佛教常言“長養善根”,意指善良如種子一般,需要不斷地探索、發展、擴大與深化。善並非固定的狀態,它就像是一株小苗,需要不斷的關注、反思與行動的滋養。當一個人能夠擴大自己原先的善,就會看到善是有層次的,如同剝一個洋蔥,有些善行只停留於表面,往下剝竟然是惡,而有些善行從發心到行為都是出自純粹的善意與愛。從某種意義上說,修行的過程也是不斷長養善根的過程。每一次善念的出現,每一次善行的實踐,都是在為我們的善根提供養分,讓它日漸深厚、枝繁葉茂。 信仰與內在力量 在行善的過程中,這需要我們不斷地反思善的內涵,同時深入理解善的複雜性,理解善並非固定的概念,而是因時而定,因人而異。我們需要藉助信仰的力量,使善行不再是偶爾的努力,而是成為我們生命本質的一部分。信仰幫助我們理解善的真實意義,使得以打破自身的局限,超越自私與惰性,走向一個更廣闊的世界。 每當我們在修行中發現更高層次的善,看到更大範圍的利他方式,就等於在心中開闢了一條新的道路。在這個過程中,我們的視野逐漸拓寬,看待世界的善與惡更加清晰,真正做到明了是非,才能做出正確的行動。這樣的善並非局限於個人利益,而是對他人和整個世界的積極關懷。通過修行,我們在點滴的反思和行動中實現了善良的昇華,也將在善行中真正做到有效關愛他人,推動社會的進步。

Spiritual Practice is the Continuous Cultivation and Deepening of Goodness

Daohe · Oct 28, 2024

Spiritual practice is often seen as a path to inner peace, wisdom, and enlightenment, with goodness as a core principle. But goodness is often misinterpreted—it isn’t merely a single gesture, but a profound inner belief grounded in unconditional love for others and for the world. This love helps us expand and get deeper into goodness, […]

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